Down With Love
I'm obsessed with love in Technicolor
LOVE - NOW IN TECHNICOLOR!
I love a rom-com, especially a 60’s one. I know they are corny and a bit campy…and also honestly very sexist — but I love them. I watched them a lot with my mom and in a lot of trailers for them the narration voice would say “Now in Technicolor!” to inspire that original 1960’s viewer to make sure they come and see it.
Technicolor is just a dope process that changed movies and got extra popular during the 50’s and 60’s. If you watch those movies you see such pigmented color and that’s why. This guy does a really good job at explaining it.
Can you imagine being on a cute date in 1964 at the drive-in with your crush? Cuddling up in the front of their car that has no seatbelts and goes far too fast? (DON’T THINK ABOUT THAT!) Their arms around you, laughing at the slapstick comedy that is on that big screen in front of you and stealing kisses in between? And then missing a lot of the movie ‘cos then y’all start getting real handsy and at that point who cares about the cuteness on screen when you’re living your real-life love story in that car. Gosh, I’d love to go to the drive-in.
I found the movie Down With Love — starring rom-com queen Reńee Zellwegger — years ago. It’s a romantic comedy set in 1960s NYC about a woman who writes a book called Down With Love! It's supposed to help the single swinging 60’s babes stop obsessing over love, choose themselves, and live their lives as sexual, strong, badass babes and reject the patriarchy. But then we meet Catcher Block (ladies man, man’s man, man about town) who wants to prove her wrong and basically kill her brand because it’s ruining his love life! He comes up with a plan to try and trick her into admitting that she wants love just like any girl does! Shenanigans ensue and it’s cute as fuck.
I watch this film a lot, but I think subconsciously I pop it in when I’m in my own lovey-dovey moment. Rom-coms always make me feel hopeful, the girl always gets the guy, there are hiccups or they miss each other but right before the credits roll you know you’re going to get that kiss in the rain, that knock on the door, that “Hey!” with a smile from the street below the window, that run down the fire escape — that sweet, pure, and true happy ending.
I love love. It’s scary sometimes but if it’s right the fear is worth it. I used to think I wasn’t supposed to have love, the simpler kind where it wasn’t tough day in and day out, or where I was trying so hard to maintain it. I know it requires work, and I know some moments will be less simple, but at least now I feel deserving of it. I love myself, but it feels good to be loved outside of that. It doesn’t make me any less than to want that.
In the film, Barbara is trying to convince herself she’s a down with love kinda girl, that needing/wanting love made her weak so she should stick to sex and work. She loved herself and could meet her sexual needs (and had a swanky single-girl apartment) so who needs anything else!? but she did — I did. We were both just taught that needing and wanting love, attention, and true adoration, was the worst thing a girl could do.
Even though I now feel like I am deserving, I’d be lying if I said I question it sometimes. Wonder if I’m going to be left behind or discarded because those thoughts sometimes take over and are harder to shake. Wonder if patience will run out in those not-so-simple moments. Wonder if my tears won’t be kissed away but instead stared at in disgust and confusion as they come down my face. These thoughts are becoming fewer, but I truly feel that I’ve been blessed with a love that will remain easy and gentle with me. I’m far more fragile than I appear and I worry that is a negative attribute, but I am working on switching my mind on that. It’s been instilled in me for years that being strong is the way to be, to hide my moments of sadness and worry until I’m alone and deal with them there. So it’s going to take time to know that being fragile is okay.
You can work on yourself by yourself. You can know who you wanna be when the right one comes along, but you’ll discover you can’t — and don’t have to — do it alone when they do.
I’m not a down with love girl, I’m the girl at the end of the movie who just wants the kiss in the rain and the declaration of love that comes before it — or we could prepare a musical number where we both express our feelings in complete harmony on a late-night talk show…both work for me.
Bonus modern romcom favs:
Two Weeks Notice
Music & Lyrics
Really Love (Not a comedy but damn it’s beautiful)
What I Watched
LOL so I love Kath and Kim, it’s a silly Australian sitcom from the early 2000’s that I binge pretty much weekly. I knew that there was a US remake but I thought it only had a pilot episode but NOPE THERE IS A WHOLE SEASON! I couldn’t find it online to watch so — I bought the DVD for like $8. It was worth every gotdamn penny. It’s terrible and I love it.
What’s the point of making money as an adult if you can’t spend money on stupid things that make you smile.
What I Re-Watched
Gypsy Sisters - For those of you who don’t know what this is watch this trailer and then have a blast watching this absolute and utter TRASH.
Videos of Trixie Mattel
What I Listened To
Bits of the playlist I’ve made with my girlfriend
“Need to Know” - Doja Cat
“WIYULD” - Evann McIntosh
“Treat Me” Chloe Bailey
Giving the New Girl podcast (Welcome to Our Show) another try and it’s okay I guess?
What I Read
My friend Harlow has a big announcement coming up that I read about on their IG and I am very excited about it!
What I Ate
Rice cake with fried egg tomato & aged white cheddar - again.
How I Felt
This week as told through Lovecraft Country gifs
Be as kind to yourself as you can be.
Love as out loud as you can.