My Ranking of "New Girl" Christmas Episodes

No Notes Plethe

Dec 22, 2022

This will cut off in your email so just open it in a browser. Consider it practice for opening a present this holiday season but you already know whats inside so you have to feign surprise.

I love New Girl, It’s a comfort show for me. I can have it on in the background when I’m working and chuckle randomly, I watch it when I’m sad and need a lift, I watch it when I’m happy and wanna be happier, and I watch it at 3 am drunk and eating tacos on my comfortable couch that is missing a leg.

They have some of the cutest holiday episodes and because of that — I have ranked them!

5. LAXmas (Season 4, Episode 11)

In this episode, everyone is going home for the holidays! Nick and Winston to Chicago, Schmidt and Cece to New York, and Coach is caught between taking a solo trip to the beach or going home to Detroit to visit his family.

At the last minute, Jess gets an invite to come to the UK with her new British boyfriend. So they make their way to LAX and all the flights are fucked up, but of course, Jess saves the day. it’s all cute and cozy and I am reminded that Delta no longer gives day passes to their lounge and it makes me sad.

Nice List:

The Christmas play the students wrote and put on that includes them going to the North Pole to avenge a gingerbread man’s death.
The Detroit references, especially this moment between Coach and his little niece!
This cute moment between Cece and Schmidt.

Naughty List:

Schmidt: “You sneaky Indian mouse”

4. Christmas Eve Eve (Season 6, Episode 10)

Jess wants to do a secret Santa in the loft to keep the holiday spirit up! She tries and fails to make it perfect and somehow someway, everything keeps falling apart. Her gift for Nick has a hiccup in it, Winston has a gift for Cece that gets kinda lost in the mail and also Schmidt keeps trying to step in to make it perfect for his now wife, and to boot—Jess was so busy putting it together that she forgets to put her name in the bowl.

More hijinx happen and we get a happy ending (I still feel weird when I write that as an adult) plus some cute bonus stuff and lots AND LOTS of nods to Christmas.

Nice List:

Nick: “The dancing girls at TV town song room” when referring to The Rockettes at Radio City Music Hall
Jess and these mismatched pajamas
The reference to one of my fav Christmas songs “Darlene love - Baby Please Come Home”
Cece: “You look like you should be paying child support in Florida”
Ferguson and his Christmas outfit

*Bonus: Season 5 didn’t have a Christmas episode BUT there is a flashback in this episode (the picture below with the loft decked out for the holidays) to a Christmas moment we have never seen and I think that was their Christmas last year which would have been season 5!

3. The 23 (Season 1, Episode 9)

The crew goes to Schmidt’s holiday office party where he is forced to play sexy Santa, also Jess is stressed out about what to get her boyfriend for their first Christmas together. Winston is stressing out about his future, and we get to see the origins of Schmidt and Cece.

I’ve heard people say that Christmas is the best time to tell folks how you feel about them and in this episode they take it and run with it, but not everyone has the best timing. I do really dig the cute scene at the end where they are knocking on everyone’s doors trying to get them to turn on their Christmas lights as a present to make Jess feel better—AND IT WORKS!!!

Nice List:

The origins of Winston becoming the world’s best nanny
Nick giving his niece and nephews dangerous household items for Christmas (tacks and nails)

Naughty List:

Before and after Cece
The Lebron refrence

2. Clavado En Un Bar (Season 3, Episode 11)

Jess gets a job offer that might take her away from teaching and she has to make her decision in just a few hours. So everyone is at the bar and they are sharing how they got into their current careers, what made them choose it, and if they are happy in it.

It’s not explicitly Christmas ‘cos the holiday only shows up in one of their backstories BUT it’s obviously Christmas ‘cos the bar is decorated for the season! I do like this episode too ‘cos we get to see how Cece and Jess first met and became friends and it’s really super cute that they have had a friendship that’s almost 20 years long!

Nice List:

Kevin 97
Cece: “I’m a 31-year-old model, my last job was for a phone sex ad and I was the one calling”
Nick tells Jess his secret that he passed the bar all those years ago
Nick dressing like this in law school
Kiddo Cece & Jess becoming besties in Portland

Naughty List:

Nick having dreads in law school
Jess saying that A Leauge Of Their Own is not a sports movie

1. Santa (Season 2, Episode 11)

They basically Christmas party hop in this episode which is both stressful and fun! Nick is having trouble being with his new girlfriend ‘cos she is a stripper and he doesn’t know how to feel about it, Jess is trying to avoid Sam who is following her to all the Holiday parties trying to get her back, and Cece and Schmidt are kinda bumping heads too.

I love it ‘cos they are all going through stuff but end up getting through it all with the help of each other, they also realize in the grand scheme of things most of them are being selfish and that they need to stop, look in the mirror and quit getting in their own way.

It’s fun and cute, silly and sexy, and also I love that they go to like a million completely different holiday parties for some reason the chaos of it all seems fun lol.

Nice List:

LESBIAN CHRISTMAS PARTY!!
Naughty gingerbread cookie that I would also make
Nick: “Sorry I called you homeboy”
Jess: “I’m going to die alone MERRY CHRISTMAS”
Nick’s lapdance
Schmidt: “I’m so sick of hanging out with Christians, this is my last Christian Christmas.”
Winston: (When they meet Black Santa): “He should be at home getting ready!”