The *Definitive* Ranking of Joe Goldberg's Love Interests
A scoop of fatal attraction...as a treat
This piece is part of A Week of YOU here on Hi Shelli! In celebration of the fifth and final season of the series!
As Netflix's YOU prepares to deliver its final chapter of Joe Goldberg's twisted journey, let's take a stroll down memory lane through the graveyard (see what I did there?) of Joe's relationships.
Our favorite literary murderer has left quite a trail of broken hearts (and more than his fair share of broken bodies) in his wake. So get in babes, we're ranking all of Joe's significant love interests, from least to most compatible!
8. KAREN MINTY (Season 1)
Sigh. My girl Karen never stood a chance. The ultimate rebound relationship after Beck. Karen's only real crime was being normal, stable, and genuinely nice (with a gorgeous fro to match). But in Joe's world, that translates to "boring." I mean, the man compared her to oatmeal.
God forbid a woman be sane, Joe! Karen's biggest flaw was that she simply wasn't damaged enough for Joe's savior complex to kick in. She deserved better than being Joe's ‘Beck’ placeholder, but at least she escaped with her life. Consider yourself lucky, Karen.
Compatibility Score: 2/10 – Too wholesome for Joe's darkness.
7. NATALIE ENGLER (Season 3)
Our suburban femme fatale barely had time to develop before Love Quinn took her out of the picture. As Joe's neighbor in Madre Linda, Natalie represented everything he thought he wanted: mystery, sophistication, and an escape from his suffocating marriage. Their chemistry was undeniable, but we'll never know if their connection could have developed into something real or if Joe was—yet again—projecting his fantasies onto yet another unsuspecting woman.
Either way, their relationship was quite literally dead on arrival. Sorry, girl.
Compatibility Score: 3/10 – Not enough screen time to truly assess, but the forbidden fruit factor was high on this one.
6. BECK (GUINEVERE BECK) (Season 1)
Ahh, the relationship that started it all for us. Beck was Joe's perfect storm: literary, beautiful, vulnerable, and juuuust damaged enough to need saving. One thing about Joe? He loves him a project. Their romance had genuine moments of sweetness… if you don’t count the stalking and eventual carnage. Alas, Beck's fatal flaw wasn't her mediocre writing (sorry!) or her toxic friendships—it was her normalcy.
She wasn't the fantasy Joe built up in his head—starting to see a pattern here, Joe… #noticing…
…just a flawed human trying to figure out her life. Once the pedestal crumbled, so did any chance of survival.
Their relationship was doomed from the first "Hello, you."
Compatibility Score: 4/10 – The chemistry was real, but so was the mismatch of expectations.
5. DELILAH ALVES (Season 2)
Potential hot take? But Delilah and Joe had what might have been his most honest connection. As his landlord in LA, she saw through his nice-guy façade from the start, and their eventual friendship had an authenticity rarely seen in Joe's relationships.
Their brief romantic encounter felt like two damaged people finding comfort in one another, rather than Joe's usual obsessive love. Had Love not intervened, could Delilah have been the one to truly understand Joe?
We'll never know, but her investigative instincts getting too close to Joe's secrets sealed her fate, making her one of the show's most tragic casualties, IMO.
Compatibility Score: 5/10 – Mutual respect and honesty, but never destined for long-term..
4. MARIENNE BELLAMY (Season 3-4)
Librarian Marienne seemed tailor-made for Joe: bookish, intelligent, and fighting her own demons. Baby, our girl Marienne checked ALL of Joe’s boxes. Their connection over books felt genuine, and her daughter brought out a protective instinct in Joe (even if it wasn't entirely unhealthy).
But what makes Marienne unique is that she's the one who got away—repeatedly. Her cat-and-mouse game with Joe across continents showed she had the survival instincts that previous women lacked. Their relationship represents Joe's most genuine attempt at redemption, even if his methods remained… problematic.
Compatibility Score: 6/10 – Intellectual equals with similar wounds, but too much baggage. Bonus points for her iconic 613 platinum blonde braids.
3. KATE LOCKWOOD (Season 4)
The ice queen who thawed Joe's heart in London brought something new to the table: she didn't need saving. Wealthy, self-possessed, and carrying her own dark secrets, Kate was Joe's match in many ways.
Their relationship evolved from mutual suspicion to genuine connection as they recognized the darkness in each other. Kate's acceptance of Joe's past (or what she knew of it) offered him a unique form of redemption. As Joe's most recent love, she represents his most mature relationship, though that's admittedly a frighteningly low bar.
Compatibility Score: 7/10 – Equals in darkness and complexity, with complementary damage.
2. LOVE QUINN (Season 2-3)
The only woman who truly matched Joe's level of obsession and willingness to kill for love. Their relationship was explosive from start to finish. What began as Joe's perfect fantasy quickly became his nightmare when he realized Love was just as broken—and dangerous—as him. Their toxic marriage in Season 3 was like watching two caged predators circling each other. Despite their dysfunction, Love and Joe understood each other in ways no one else could.
Remember “I wolf you”? Exactly.
Ultimately, she was the mirror Joe never wanted to look into, making their fiery end inevitable but oddly fitting.
Compatibility Score: Perfect match in intensity and darkness, horrible match for a stable and, generally, non-murderous relationship.
1. CANDACE STONE (Season 1-2)
Joe's mysterious ex, who refused to stay dead earns the top spot not because they were good together, but because their relationship defined him. Candace was the origin story for Joe's pattern of obsession, stalking, and violence. She was the one who recognized his true nature before anyone else and fought back.
Their relationship taught Joe his methods, showed his weaknesses, and established the cycle that would repeat with every woman after. Most importantly, Candace was the only woman who truly frightened Joe—not because she might hurt him, but because she knew exactly who he was behind the mask.
Compatibility Score: 9/10 – Their dysfunction shaped Joe into the predator we know today.
So as we prepare for Joe's final chapter, one question remains: will he find someone who breaks this deadly pattern, or is Joe destined to repeat his cycle of obsession forever?
Whatever happens in the final season (Out TOMORROW), one thing is certain—in Joe's world, love and death have always been uncomfortably close companions.
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